Back at one

8 04 2009


So this is what it feels like to take a hiatus of sorts.


Of the many definitions I could give the word “hiatus,” the one I think best describes what happened to me is an interruption in the intensity, amount, or frequency of my blog posts.  Seriously, I thought nobody would notice that I haven’t been posting lately.   This, especially since when I started this blog, I was just hoping against hope that at most three superheroes (a bat, a spider  and someone really super!), a “summit,” a special “friendship” and a dependable “partner” would keep traffic on my site.  So that’s about six hits per day – at best.


But I thought wrong.  Lately, I’ve gotten a lot of text messages, e-Mails and instant messages asking what was wrong that I haven’t been posting lately.  Even my energy level has been so down – not even many invitations to jump in party planning mode (for a lot of things happening this April) could shake me out of being distraught with the intense sorrow that I feel.  As some of you may well know, I have been feeling nothing short of being shot with a hollow-point bullet that fragmented upon impact, bloomed inside me…  and cut me into pieces inside out.


But life has to go on.  If the people with whom I empathize have been picking up the pieces, so to speak, all the more that I should.


But I know that the worst feeling is yet to come.  I will just see myself through this calm before the storm.  And when the time comes, I will wallow in the moment as the joy in my life ebbs away.